The escape

It never occurred to me until now why I was so interested in Alice in Wonderland and Peter Pan other than the costumes and set and the fact that I have ideas for several art piece. I was interested in the fact that both story is about going to another land. 

When I was in high school, all I ever wanted was to get out. Getting out of my situation, my location, etc. I felt stuck. I didn't get what I imagined high school to be. I wanted to escape and constantly wishing that I was somewhere else. Alice went into a world where things doesn't make sense but it does. Peter was in a land where he never had to worry about aging, being able to do anything he wishes and not worrying. I wanted to feel free and away from everyone and come into a place where I felt loved or even a place where I had true friends that I don't have to be fake around them. 

Growing up, I've always pretended. Faking my way through life. I try to not do that now but it's kind of hard to let go of something completely that you've been doing for years. I still feel that I need to pretend. The world wants me to smile so that they don't have to see my natural bitch face but I want to smile because I'm genuine about it. I want to smile for the real reasons. I want a smile that doesn't take a lot of energy to make. But the world always wins and I'm not happy. I really look forward to the day that I smile genuinely and say "I'm happy, I'm truly happy". 

 

Anyways, thank you for reading 

and I really hope and pray that you have a nice day.